Families Refusing Opioids for Pain in Dying Loved Ones


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Refusal of care in the palliative care setting, lack of cooperation in treating pain. Fear the pain medicine will kill. Addicts dying of overdoses. Fear the dying grandmother will be addicted or die from the pain medicine. Fear of addiction in the family, unsafe to keep opioid for the patient. So many fears, myths and misunderstandings.

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Fear has taken over in so many levels of our consciousness. That is why we all need to educate ourselves so that we are prepared to safely help those we love when the time arises.

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Death and dying need not mean agonizing pain. Strong pain may require strong opioids for relief, and strong opioids can be safely adjusted to allow good mental function so you and your loved ones can be present in the last days. Not, not in shock and anguish from screaming pain going on for weeks.

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Yes, I have been called to help a family whose mother was in her last days, on palliative care. Her only communication for weeks was loudly moaning with grimacing and wincing the muscles of her face. They were refusing to give even the tiniest drops of morphine under her tongue, as recommended weeks ago by the palliative care physician.

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Refusal of care will only get worse, not just for the dying but millions with chronic pain. Physicians refusing to treat pain or being firmly uncooperative with family or pain team recommendations. This is a huge issue in cancer hospitals and cancer wards. The old way was never to give opioids for cancer. The standards in medicine are set by the old guys who pass it on and control all coming up the ranks. Don’t step out of line. Fear is in control.

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Dispel that fear. Inform yourself in proper care recommendations by leaders in the field or you will live with regret when your loved ones died screaming in pain and you refused care. I have seen many oncologists refuse pain care and threaten patients, families and staff.

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Read some of the myths and issues that are too frequently encountered by caregivers all across the country – click here.

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The material on this site is for informational purposes only.

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It is not legal for me to provide medical advice without an examination.

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It is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

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Comments are welcome.

This site is not for email, not for medical questions, and not for appointments.

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For My Home Page, click here:  Welcome to my Weblog on Pain Management!

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Please IGNORE THE ADS BELOW. They are not from me.

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